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Author Topic: A Moment of Doubt  (Read 4294 times)
Brian_Starr
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« on: 06 06, 2005, 04:35: PM »

Here is a little screen play I worked up while taking Klingon Rituals.  I think it would make a fine Fan Film, but want your criticism and advice.  Please remember that while everyone likes to hear compliments, the work can only improve with honest opinions.  Rake me over the coals, I can take it.

A Moment of Doubt
By Thomas Hudspeth

EXT. SPACE - A KLINGON BIRD OF PREY, I.K.S. GREAT HUNT

INT.  I.K.S. GREAT HUNT – BRIDGE

Captain Krieg(war) sits in his command chair.  He is old for a warrior.  Five other Klingons are at their stations, including one female, K’schNit(slash).  She is young and volupous. She stands behind Krieg to the left at a console.  To the right rear is a male Klingon, Zorn(anger), at his console. Between the consoles is the main hatch. To the forward of Krieg, from right to left are three, Jugend (youth), Flier(flyer) and Ungeduld(impatience). Ehrgeiz(ambition) enters through the main hatch and moves to Zorn.

EHRGEIZ: (whisper)
He is old, we should kill him.  We would all advance.

ZORN: (whisper)
And who would replace him?  You?

EHRGEIZ: (louder)
And why not?

Krieg notices.  He takes a pill.

EHRGEIZ: (whisper)
Look at him, he takes drugs.  He is weak.  Join with me and become my first officer.

K’schNit moves over to the two.

K’SCHNIT:
Be quiet you fools.  You do not know what you do.

EHRGEIZ: (louder)
Go back to your science station wench.

KRIEG:
Report to me! I am still in command here!

Ehrgeiz descends to the foredeck.

EHRGEIZ: (sarcastic)
The disrupters are still in pristine condition.  It is no wonder, since we have not used them in 3 months.

KRIEG:
I know your warrior’s heart chaffs at this inaction, but we have our orders.

EHRGEIZ:
Orders are things you hide behind when you are too old to fight.

KRIEG: (stands)
What! You dare challenge me!

EHRGEIZ:
Yes, old man!  You should have died honorably in combat long ago.  Let me make it quick for you.

KRIEG:
Who stands with you?
(Krieg looks around the bridge.)
Come forward if you agree with this dog!
(Zorn and Ungeduld join Ehrgeiz.  Krieg sits down in his chair.)
So, I see this has been brewing amongst you.  Very well, I accept your challenge!

Krieg smashes some glass on the arm of his chair, pressing a glowing red button.  Gas streams into the bridge.  A brief struggle and all collapse.

EXT. SPACE - I.K.S. GREAT HUNT

INT.– BRIDGE

Krieg wakes up.  He puts a mask on to breathe.  He stands and looks down at the mutineers.

KRIEG:
I should kill you now.  
(sigh)
But where would the honor be in that.  Besides, you are right. I am old.
(kneels down to Ehrgeiz)
And I take drugs, but not for age, for resistance to gas my young hot head.
(stands)
Very well, the challenge has been issued and accepted.

Krieg moves to the pilot chair, pushes an unconscious Flier aside and sits down.  Fiddles with controls, seems pleased.

KRIEG:
Ah, yes, this planet will do.

EXT. SPACE - I.K.S. GREAT HUNT

Ship moves through space to a planet.  We follow it until it lands in a desert.

INT.– BRIDGE

All is quiet.  All the systems are off. Krieg is gone.  All wake up.

EHRGEIZ:
What happened?  Status!

FLIER:
The ship has landed.

K’SCHNIT:
Only emergency systems are active.

ZORN:
We are defenseless!

UNGEDULD:
What happened?

EHRGEIZ:
That dog of a captain gassed us and ran away.  He was too afraid to fight me! I am now Captain!

The main hatch opens.  Glaub (trust) enters.  He crosses down to the fore and opens a maintenance panel.

EHRGEIZ:
Glaub, how soon can we get power back on?

GLAUB:
Never.

EHRGEIZ:
What do you mean?  I order you to return power now!

GLAUB:
And I tell you the ship has been sabotaged!

EHRGEIZ: (angry)
Which one of you did this?
(points to each)
You Ungeduld? You , K’schNit?

JUGEND:
Wait! There is a message from Captain Krieg.

EHRGEIZ: (angry)
Play it!

MAIN VIEW SCREEN

KRIEG:
So, you would be captain.  Very well, the ship is yours.
(holds up a data chip on a chain around his neck)
All you have to do is find this.
(pause)
The challenge has been issued and accepted!  Kill me if you can!

The screen goes blank.

INT.– BRIDGE

EHRGEIZ:
So, it is a hunt! I will gut him like a Targ. His death will be slow and painful.  Who is with me?

ZORN:
I will follow you!

UNGEDULD:
I will also come.

EHRGEIZ:
K’schNit? Glaub?

K’SCHNIT: (scornful)
I will join you, if only to watch you die.

GLAUB:
I will not go on this fools quest.

EHRGEIZ:
Fine, stay here and fix my ship.

JUGEND:
I, I would like to hunt.

EHRGEIZ:
You? Even Krieg could kill you with a glance.  No, you must stay here.

JUGEND:
I have every much a right to hunt as these others!

K’SCHNIT:
Are you afraid this youth will defeat Krieg and claim your prize?

EHRGEIZ:
NO! Very well, it is his life to throw away.

EXT. PLANET - I.K.S. GREAT HUNT

The hunters descend down a boarding ramp.  It is dusk.

K’SCHNIT:
It grows dark.

EHRGEIZ:
What? Are you afraid?

ZORN:
We will lose the trail at night.

UNGEDULD:
We should press on.

EHRGEIZ:
No, we will wait until morning.  Let the old fool have a night to worry.

EXT. PLANET

Hero shot of Krieg.  He stands on a bluff overlooking the I.K.S. Great Hunt.  His hair and robes billow in the wind. Below you can see the hunting party returning to the ship.  Krieg turns and confidently strides off.

INT. CAVE NIGHT

Krieg sits in front of a large fire.  He chants and occasionally throws something on the fire to make it flare.  A figure appears.

KRIEG:
Father, is it you? Have you answered my vision quest?

FATHER:
Yes, my son. What troubles you?

KRIEG:
Father, I have grown old, tired.  I should have died in combat long ago.

FATHER:
You are too great a warrior to do that.
(pause)
I see doubt in you, this is unbecoming a warrior.

KRIEG:
Father, I try to be like you.

FATHER:
No, do not be like me, be yourself.  I never challenged my whole crew.

KRIEG:
You never had to.

FATHER:
Son, you have no need to doubt.  Either you will die in honorable combat against younger warriors, or you will defeat them.  Either way, you win. There is nothing shameful in falling to a superior enemy.

KRIEG:
So, you think I should die?

FATHER:
NO! You are a great warrior.  Oh, you will die someday, but not asleep in your bed.  I know you.
(pause)
Son, this doubt will lead to your death.  You must purge yourself of it.  Here, I grant you a gift.  Arise my son, the enemy comes!

Father fades away.  Krieg looks stunned for a second, then leaps to his feet.  A dinosaur man (or other monster) rushes into the cave.  Krieg fights and kills the monster.  As he looks over the lifeless body, he says…

KRIEG:
Thank you father.
(Maniacal laughter.)

EXT. PLANET - I.K.S. GREAT HUNT

The hunters, Ehrgeiz, Zorn, Ungeduld and K’schNit descend down a boarding ramp.  It is morning.

EHRGEIZ:
Ah, it is a good morning to hunt.

K’SCHNIT:
Your over confidence will be your undoing.

EHRGEIZ:
Quiet wench!

UNGEDULD:
Let us go, Krieg has too much of a lead on us already.

Jugend runs down the ramp loaded with several packs.  He is late.

JUGEND:
I am ready.

ZORN:
Fool, did you think we would wait all morning?

UNGEDULD:
And look at him!  He will not make it three miles.

Zorn and Ungeduld begin to remove the packs.

UNGEDULD:
What do you have in here anyway.

JUGEND:
A few supplies.  I can take what I want!

EHRGEIZ:
Let him be.  We may have a long hunt ahead.  If he tires, he can return to the ship.

ZORN:
While we keep his food!

UNGEDULD:
Yes, come pack mule!

EHRGEIZ:
Announce the hunt.

Zorn raises a horn to his lips and blows it, two notes, low to high.  In the distance, an answering sound is heard. Three notes, two the same and a higher one.

EHRGEIZ:
Qapla’

THE REST:
Qapla’

The party moves off, Jugend collecting his bags and trailing along. K’schNit takes one, looks inside, and shoulders it.

EXT. PLANET – DESERT

Several scenes of the hunting party traveling. It might be funny to include a shot that resembles the painting sold by STARTREK.COM. Ungeduld moves ahead.

EXT. PLANET – SMALL RAVINE

Krieg moves above the ravine.  He picks up a rock and throws it.

EXT. PLANET – LARGE WASH

Ungeduld walks down the wash.  A rock hits the side, causing a small landslide.  Ungeduld looks toward the sound.

UNGEDULD:
Ha! I have you old man!

Ungeduld runs into the small ravine after Krieg.

EXT. PLANET – CLIFF TOP

The ravine stops at a ledge over looking a cliff.  Krieg looks over the cliff, then hides to one side of the ravine opening.  Ungeduld runs onto the ledge and stops just before toppleing over.  He turns to see Krieg behind him.  Krieg lifts his foot and kicks Ungeduld over the cliff.  Ungeduld falls.

UNGEDULD:
AAAAAAA!

Krieg looks over the cliff at the fallen Ungeduld, then climbs up the side of the ravine to escape.  The rest of the hunters arrive behind Ehrgeiz. Ehrgeiz looks down at Ungeduld’s still form.

EHRGEIZ:
The fool! He fell over the side.
(heavy sigh)
I guess we will have to go down and make sure he’s dead.  Come on.

The hunting party climbs down the cliff.

EXT. PLANET – BASE OF CLIFF

Ungeduld lies unconscious on the ground as Ehrgeiz, Zorn, Jugend and K’schNit approach. Ehrgeiz looks around for a trap.

EHRGEIZ:
Check on that idiot.

Jugend and K’schNit check Ungeduld.

K’SCHNIT:
He is wounded.  There is some internal bleeding, a slight concussion and a leg is broken, but he will survive.

EHRGEIZ: (doubtful)
I guess that is a good thing.
(Ehrgeiz kneels down to K’schNit.)
I want to know, did this fool fall, or was he pushed?

K’SCHNIT:
I can not tell until he awakes.

EHRGEIZ:
Fine, we will make camp.
(stands)
Zorn, Jugend, gather fuel for a fire.

Zorn and Jugend leave in different directions.

EXT. PLANET – LARGE WASH

Zorn walks down the wash gathering wood.  He is grumbling about it not being a task for a warrior.  As he passes a small indention, Krieg steps out behind him.  Zorn drops his wood as he turns around.  Both raise their weapons, circle each other and brandish their bat’lelh’s.  Zorn is more energetic while Krieg is smooth and flowing.

KRIEG:
Aren’t you going to call your friends?

ZORN:
No, I do not need them to kill an old man! I will carve you up like a festival targ!

Zorn rushes to attack.  Battle ensues.  Krieg wins, but is wounded in one arm.  Zorn dies from a final stroke by Krieg.  After checking the body, Krieg howls in the ancient Klingon announcment.

EXT. PLANET – BASE OF CLIFF CAMP

Ehrgeiz and K’schNit both stand up when they hear the howl.  

EHRGEIZ:
Zorn! He has found Krieg and taken my prize!

K’schNit grabs Ehrgeiz arm before he can rush off.

K’SCHNIT:
No, that is Krieg telling us Zorn is dead.

Ehrgeiz pulls his arm free and rushes off.  

EXT. PLANET – LARGE WASH

Zarn’s body lies dead. Ehrgeiz rushes up to it and looks around.

EHRGEIZ:
You won’t find me to be such an easy target!  Come out and face me!  FACE ME!

EXT. PLANET – BASE OF CLIFF CAMP

Ungeduld still lies on the ground.  K’schNit watches over him as Jugend arrives with his wood at a run.

JUGEND:
I heard howling.

K’SCHNIT:
Zorn is dead. Ehrgeiz is raving. Build your fire here.  We will partake of your supplies.

EXT. PLANET – BASE OF CLIFF CAMP NIGHT

Jugend is on guard duty while the rest sleep.  He sneaks off.

EXT. PLANET – LARGE WASH NIGHT

Jugend moves from cover to cover.  He is looking for Krieg.  He pulls out a disrupter.  As he hides behind a rock, Krieg appears behind him and hits him over the head.  Jugend falls.

INT. CAVE NIGHT

Jugend is tied up.  Krieg sits before a fire drinking or smoking.  Jugend stirs.

KRIEG:
Go ahead, sit up.  I know you are awake.

Jugend sits up.

JUGEND:
Why did you attack me from behind?  Have you no honor?

KRIEG:
What do you know of honor? You did not play by the rules!  A hunt has rules handed down through countless generations of warriors, all the way back to Kahless the Unforgetable.  You do not hunt at night.  You do not bring an energy weapon to a knife fight.  You do not try to sneak up on old men while they sleep!  You meet your enemy, face to face with equal weapons under the light of day.  There you will find honor! Even Ehrgeiz knows this.

Jugend stuggles in his bonds.

KRIEG:
Bah, I will release you.  Hold still.

Krieg cuts Jugend’s bonds.  Jugend reaches for his weapons, but finds them gone.  He looks up at Krieg.

JUGEND:
You have taken my weapons!

KRIEG:
I am not a fool to be killed by a pup still wet behind his ears.
(heavy sigh)
Have you heard nothing of what I said?  At night, we are civilized.  Here…
(Krieg hands Jugend a mug/bota bag)
Drink! Tomorrow I will return your weapons and we can fight if you still wish it.

Jugend takes the mug and drinks from it.

KRIEG:
I am curious, why do you wish kill me.

JUGEND:
For the honor.  I am young and strong, you are old and weak.  You have no choice but to fall before me.

KRIEG:
And yet you chose to use dishonorable means. You can not find honor acting dishonorably.  
(pause)
Strength alone does not make you a warrior. Nor clever tricks.  Training, skill, discipline, these are what you lack.  Your inexperience makes you weak, and there is no honor in killing the weak.
(pause)
I think you know you can not defeat me in a fair fight.  How then would you keep Ehrgeiz from killing you?

JUGEND:
If I killed you, he would have to acknowledge my superiority.  He would respect me. He would have to follow me!

KRIEG:
Like he followed me?  Like he respected me?  Warriors respect honor!  Agh, the very timing and means of your plan show you have no clue what I am talking about.
(pause)
Your plan would not have worked.  The disrupter would have destroyed the codes you need to launch the ship.  You would have been stranded on this planet. Eventually, you would all have hunted each other down and killed yourselves.  I have seen it before.

JUGEND:
I am a Klingon warrior!  There is nothing shameful in falling to a superior enemy.

Krieg notes the phrase.

KRIEG: (laugh)
The invincibility of youth.  You think nothing can kill you!  Fools die young.  Tell me, are you ready to see Sto-vo-Kor?  Have you earned the right to stand there with your fathers?  What great battles have you fought?  What great enemies have you crushed? Is the list of fallen longer than your arm?  Or is it shorter than your beard?
(pause)
Do not be so quick to rush to your death.  The heroes of Sto-vo-Kor will wait for you, and regard you better.  Warriors are meant to fight and win!  Not throw away their lives.  We do battle to enrich our souls.  Only a fool fights when he does not have to, when there is no chance of honor.

JUGEND:
But some of our best legends speak of warriors holding out against impossible odds.  Would you have me give up?

KRIEG:
No! Never! Warriors do not surrender!  But a true warrior picks his fights wisely. He does not spend his energies unless the effort is worth the risk.  Even in death, one can find honor if the goal is virtuous.
(pause)
What you must do is learn the meaning, the value of your honor, so you understand what it is you defend.  Until you have attained this knowledge, you honor is as hollow as a reed, and as strong.
(Krieg snaps a twig.)
Bah, I am tired, I will sleep now.

JUGEND:
You are not tying me up?

KRIEG:
I have told you about honor. Either you heard me or not. If you kill me in my sleep, well, my place in Sto-vo-Kor is already secure.  Think about yours.

Krieg rolls over and falls asleep.  Jugend watches him for some kind of trick, then relaxes thoughtfully.

INT. CAVE DAY

K’schNit finds Jugend asleep.  Krieg catches her off guard.  He holds knife to her throat.  Jugend watches nerviously, but does not interfere.

K’SCHNIT:
Commander, I remain loyal, I have only come to bear witness to what occurs.

KRIEG:
Prove it!

K’SCHNIT:
If I were not, you would be dead already.

K’schNit nods to the knife she holds to Krieg’s belly.  Krieg sees it.

KRIEG:
That only proves you are slower or you hesitated, signs of weakness, not loyalty.

K’SCHNIT:
I am the bej noH, you will not harm me.

KRIEG:
Very well then.

They separate.  Jugend looks on relieved.  

KRIEG:
It is morning, the light of day shines upon us.  As I promised, here are your weapons.

Krieg throws a sack to Jugend, who goes through it pulling out his weapons.  Krieg twirls his Bat’leth.

KRIEG:
So, now young one.  Are you ready to die?

Jugend looks on uncertain.  K’schNit is surprised.

JUGEND:
I have found wisdom in your words.  I will not throw my life away uselessly.

KRIEG:
Then you have started your journey to becoming a warrior.
(pause)
There is still one I must teach.

K’SCHNIT:
Let me join with you.  Together we will over come Ehrgeiz.  

JUGEND:
I also wish to aid you.

K’SCHNIT:
A warrior does not let a comrade face danger alone.  

KRIEG:
(to  K’schNit)
No, you came to observe,  bej noH, you can not have it both ways.
(to Jugend)
And you have only started your journey, you must have time to finish it.
(to both)
A warrior must fight his own battles.  A leader must stand alone.  

K’SCHNIT:
You are wounded.

KRIEG:
What matter wounds to a warrior? Pain only sharpens my wits.  Reminds me that I am alive.

K’SCHNIT:
May your enemies run with fear.

JUGEND:
May you die well.

K’SCHNIT AND JUGEND:
Qapla’

Krieg leaves the cave.

EXT. PLANET – LARGE WASH

Krieg enters.

KRIEG:
Ehrgeiz, I tire of this hunt!  If you would have me, come!

Ehrgeiz comes running.  K’schNit and Jugend stand to one side.

EHRGEIZ:
I see you old man, you should have commited Maok-to Vor when you had the chance.  Let me make this quick for you.

KRIEG:
I made you my second in command to teach you.  Now, I have only one more lesson to give, how to die.

Ehrgeiz charges with a yell.  They do battle.  Things go both ways several times.  Krieg wins and kills Ehrgeiz.  Then he howls to announce that a warrior is coming to Sto-vo-Kor.  

KRIEG:
There, the lesson is learned too late for him. Let us return to MY ship.

All walk off.

END
« Last Edit: 09 29, 2005, 06:42: AM by Brian_Starr » Logged
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