Klingon Dialogue for New Short Film

[edsinclair]

Dear All

I am a UK short film-maker who is about to produce his third short film (our first, One Day, premiered at the prestigious Oscar-accredited Rhode Island International Film Festival, whilst our second is nearing completion).  This third one is a dark comedy filmed entirely from the point of view of a cat!  Whilst this may seem an odd idea for a film, we have a very funny script, full of (brace yourselves!), bad language, adultery and murder - all seen through the eyes of a cat, who couldn't care less about what the humans are up to.

Here's where the Klingon comes in: because we are seeing things from a cat's perspective, it is important that the human dialogue is incomprehensible.  We could just have the actors speaking gobbledegook, but we thought it would be much funnier and easier for the actors (their lines would actually mean something), if they were speaking Klingon.  We really feel this would add a great extra layer to the film, as well as boosting the film's audience and increasing the exposure of Klingon to a wider public.  Our intention is to exhibit this film on the internet, a growing forum for film and perfect for the tone of this one.  In keeping with the concept of the film, whilst the cat's miaows will be translated into English subtitles during the film, the human dialogue will remain untranslated from the Klingon.  (If there is interest once the film is on the net, we will publish an English translation of the Klingon dialogue separately).

I would like to emphasise that our interest in using Klingon, whilst fairly frivolous, is all about having fun.  We sincerely hope it will be taken in that spirit (please advise!) It is certainly not about mocking Klingon or its speakers, and we have no intention of offending anyone with an interest in Klingon.  The actors in the film will be doing their level best to render the Klingon correctly.

So: can anyone help out?  There are only about 20 short lines of dialogue and we are prepared to accept significant alterations in their meaning.  Indeed, we would be happy to see translators being creative with their translations, if they think alternative lines might be funny and/or add extra interest from a Klingon perspective (thereby giving the film a kind of hidden inner life, accessible only to Klingon speakers). 

Needless to say, anyone who helps out will receive credits at the end of the film, and a copy of the film on DVD.

If you would like to have a look at the script, I hope to hear from you soon  - we begin filming in just under a month!

Yours faithfully

Ed Sinclair.

[Abbot Nej vIt]

Ed,

This Sounds Like a Kewl Project... I am Not a Particularly Accomplished Klingon Linguist However, So I Hope that Some of the More Knowledgeable and Gifted Contributers here might be Better able to Assist.

Regardless this is Certainly a Novel Idea and I wish You Success in Your Efforts.

Qapla'!

[ter'eS]

Normally I'd be up for a project like this, but I've got too much going on right now 

-- ter'eS

[Klythe]

    Yeah, we'll probably have to be creative to translate everyday hyoomin dialog to the Klingon language.   

    Well... If it doesn't have to be translated particularly accurately...  }}:P    I'm actually about to have more free time coming up so I may to be able to help you, but I'm still a novice Klingon speaker.   Still, you'd probably best to contact the Klingon Language Institute directly.   But they've been pretty quiet lately.   

    I'd perfer if you post the dialog to the forums, but if you'd perfer you can send it to me via email or private message.

[edsinclair]

Dear Klythe

Thanks for your post.  Yeah, we’ve tried the KLI institute and got a positive response from Lawrence but have since not heard from him, so we’re exploring other avenues.  I guess he’s just very busy.  Here’s the dialogue we need translated.  Have fun!  And if anyone else fancies a go, feel free.  You’ll all get a credit! (woo-hoo!)

Scene 1. In this scene, the adulterers are entering the house. This is just dialogue for them to say before they head upstairs, so the specifics of what they are saying doesn’t matter.  Have fun, but don’t go longer than this and try to make sure your dialogue fits roughly with the scenario – ie. A bit of urgency/passion. Klingon culture references are fine if you want to put in an in joke or two!

“...so it’s hard to see how they’ll get away with it-“

“Mmm, I want you.”

“Where’s the bedroom?”

“This way, come on.”

“How long have we got?”

“An hour or two.”

“Is that long enough?”


Scene 2. This scene takes place in the midst of the adulterers’ passion, so you can have real fun here.   (my writing partner and I are particularly taken by the idea of one of them shouting “thrusters!”, a word we came across in a Klingon dictionary).  Again, try to keep it about the same length.  And the last two lines must be translated as faithfully as possible.

“Ooh, yes.  That’s right. Right there!”

“You like that, don’t you?”

“Mm.  It’s so good.  Harder!”

“What is it?”

“Can we get rid of the cat?”

Scene 3. This scene is as the husband comes home early from work and realizes there’s been a burglar in the house, so Klingon curses please! Again, the last line should be a faithful translation.

“Oh, my God!”

“Bloody hell!”

“Dammit!”

“Alright! That’s enough!” or “OK!  Shut up!” (this is directed at the cat, who is whining)

Scene 4. This final scene is after there has been a fight between the husband and the lover, and the husband has stabbed the lover.  The cat finds the body at the bottom of the stairs.  The wife and husband are making horrified, disbelieving noises, eg:

“Oh, my God! Oh, my God!”

“He was just…I…I…Oh, God!”

“What were you…?”

And then, as the cat starts lapping at the blood:

“Stop it!”



Thanks, and good luck!

Ed

[Klythe]

    Oh, This is good stuff!   I can't wait to start translating this!   

    Just to be clear, the first line is just the end of some irrellevant conversation, that somehow makes the lover appealing to the wife...

    The second to last line in the second scene, one of the two adulterers is interupted by something like a noise the cat made.

[edsinclair]

Yep, that's right.

The first line of conversation is actually the Wife, though it doesn't particularly matter.  It is, as you say, an irrelevant piece of conversation.  It doesn't even need to make her attractive to him - she is simply filling space with some innocuous conversation as they come into the house, probably so the neighbours don't gossip. Perhaps it is about work, or her new car, or something.  As soon as the door closes, they can get on with the job in hand.

And the noise that interrupts them in the second scene is the cat purring.  He has sneaked in while they are in the middle of it and made himself comfortable on the armchair in the corner with a grandstand view.  He is purring because he is pleased to see his mother so happy!

[qurgh_]

Here's your translation:

Scene 1.

… Soj vInejtaH ‘ej ravDaq qurghmey vISam. ghIH ghaH ….. (Random chatter about food)

Grrrr, qaneH.

nuqDaq ‘oH QongDaqpa’?

pa’, yIghoS!

poH ’ar wIghaj?

rep, cha’ rep

yap’a’?

Scene 2.

Grrr… luuuuuqqq… maaaaj… maaaaj...

DaparHa’, jIlugh’a’?

Grrr… maj maj…

wabvam nuq?

vIghro’ wIwoDlaH’a’?

Scene 3.

Hu’tegh!

ghay’cha’!

Qu’vatlh!

bIjatlh ‘e’ yImev!!!

Scene 4.

Hu’tegh…. Hu’tegh….

ghaH… jIH… jIH… Qu’vatlh!

nuq… SoH…. ?

And then, as the cat starts lapping at the blood:

yImev!

Notes: I took out the quote marks because it makes it harder to see the ' in the Klingon. Klingon's growl a lot during mating rituals, and maj is a klingon version of "oooo, that's gooooo". If you need to know how to pronouce this, let me know. I can even make audio recordings for you.


[Edit -- Addendum]  Well I guess he's already filmed this.... If he ever comes back with another task like this, shoot me any email.