Abusing computers in tlhIngan Hol

[Harfish]

nuqneH

I was wondering if someone more skilling in klingon than myself could give me a few phrases to use. In my line of work I often find myself frustrated with computers and I'd like to swear at them, but since I work in a school I have to watch my language. I figured if I swear in klingon nobody will ever know what I'm really saying.

Perhaps phrases like:

"You stupid computer"

"Worthless piece of junk"

"Piece of crap"

That kind of thing.

Thanks a lot

[Kesvirit]

As one who battles with the wretched machines every day, I would prefer to abuse them physically instead of verbally. But the authorities and the machines' owners frown upon that... ::sigh::

Caveat: I must caution you that I am a mere beginner, and recommend that you have this verified/corrected by a speaker with more knowledge and experience before committing yourself to it.

To give you some qualified answers:

"You stupid computer"
{De'wI' QIp}

"Worthless piece of junk"
lo'laHbe' -- v. worthless
veQ -- garbage
'ay' -- component, part
{lo'laHbe' veQ' ay'} or {lo'laHbe'veQ'ay'} (I can see arguments for both the use of separate words and one longer compound word. Opinions?)

The equivalent of the word "crap" may not have the loaded meaning in tlhIngan that it does in English; I do not know if a literal translation will have the effect you desire. (Then again, the phrases you listed above do not come across to me as having a particularly corrosive effect on young ears.) Two approximations would be:
porgh -- body
DI -- litter, rubble, debris
puch -- toilet
{porgh DI}, or perhaps {puch DI}
I would personally prefer to omit the word "piece". The only word we have for it, {'ay'}, implies something that is part of a larger, working whole.

In tlhIngan Hol, the best swearing comes not so much from the most offensive words, but with the composition of the most creative insults. See the thread on Curse warfare for examples and inspiration. If you come up with any particularly good invective against those piles of mineral and plastic that threaten to take over our lives, I encourage you to post it!

-=- Kesvirit

[qoSagh]

What's wrong with dwalsk? The literal meaning seems to me to be just what the one is looking for. The fact that it has become derogotory adds an even better play on words.

[Kesvirit]

Rein in your tongue before you lose it! To speak so in public will earn you an honor challenge! Zan Harfish shows discretion in considering what effect his words will have on impressionable young minds, and you respond in such a manner that... that... %$##Z%(&^*W)*&^!!!... ::trails off in a fit of outrage and spittle::

-=- Kesvirit

[Abbot Nej vIt]

Might I Suggest that in Addition to a Few Choice, and "Colorful" Klingon Metaphores, the One Also Commit to Memory a Few Appropriate Replacement Proverbs as Well, Perhaps These would do:

reH Suvrup SuvwI' 'a'
"A great warrior is always prepared."

Hagh qoHpu' neH HeghtaHvIS SuvwI'pu'
"Only fools laugh while warriors die."

By Memorizing these little Gems, Those that See through Your Anger, might be Less Likely to Challange your honor For Blaming Equipment malfunction over Operator Headspace...(Should that ever be the Cause of the Curses in the First Place...

In Any Event a Well Placed Replacement Proverb goes far in Retaining a Certain Level of Dignity in an Otherwise Awkward if Minor Situation where one might lose Face...