Translation of Qeylls stories

[Floris Schonfeld]

Greetings Imperial forum members,

I am looking for translations of some of the stories of Qeylls.
One would think that these epic tales would long since be translated but I haven't found anything as of yet.
Unfortunately I am a novice in the art of tlhgang Hol and am having a difficult time trying to figure these translations out for myself.


The stories I am looking for are:

Kahless held his father's lifeless body in his arms. He could not believe what his brother had done.  His brother threw their father's sword into the sea, saying that if he could not possess it, neither would Kahless.
Kahless was determined to punish his brother for his grave misdeeds but Morath refused to fight his brother, and instead ran away.
Kahless pursued him across valleys and over mountains, all the way back to the edge of the sea. And there on the shore, they fought for twelve days and twelve nights.
Qeylls killed his brother at the break of the thirteenth morning.
There is no victory without honor.

A thousand years ago, at the dawn of the Empire, five hundred warriors stormed the Great Hall at Qam-Chee.
The city garrison fled before them. Only the Emperor Kahless, and the Lady Lukara stood their ground.
Finally, after many hours, and with the Great Hall ankle-deep in blood, they emerged victorious, and made passionate love.
It was here that they began the greatest romance in Klingon history.   

Long ago, a storm was heading for the city of Quin'lat. Everyone took protection within the walls except one man who remained outside.
Kahless went to him and asked what he was doing. "I am not afraid," the man said. "I will not hide my face behind stone and mortar.
 I will stand before the wind and make it respect me." Kahless honored his choice and went back inside.
The next day, the storm came, and the man was killed, as the wind does not respect a fool.

I would greatly appreciate any tips on where I could find these translations and if they require translating, would bestow much honor on those who would rise to the challenge!

Many thanks and Qapla' to you all!

Floris   

[Jon]

I had a stab at this. The sentences in brackets are my rephrasings of the originals to ease the translation. I would appreciate any comments or criticism.

I used betleH for sword following the phrase Sword of Kahless from KGT.

Kahless held his father's lifeless body in his arms. (Kahless holds his father's body which does not live in his arms.)
   DeSDu'DajDaq vavDaj yInbe'bogh porgh 'uch qeylIS.
He could not believe what his brother had done.  (He did not believe his brother's deed.)
   loDnI'Daj ta' Harbe'.
His brother threw their father's sword into the sea,
   bIQ'a'Daq vavchaj betleH woD loDnI'Daj,
saying that if he could not possess it, neither would Kahless. (His brother said: "If I cannot possess then Kahless cannot possess it.")
   jatlh loDnI'Daj: <<vIghajbe'chugh vaj ghajbe' qeylIS.>>
Kahless was determined to punish his brother for his grave misdeeds (because he mis-accomplished much he punishes his brother that K decided)
   ta'Ha'qu'mo' loDnI'Daj Hup 'e' wuq qeylIS
but Morath refused to fight his brother, (but Morath won't fight his brother)
   'ach loDnI'Daj SuvQo' *Morath*,
and instead ran away. (but ran away.)
   'ach Haw'.
Kahless pursued him across valleys and over mountains, (Kahless chased him in valleys and mountains,)
   ngechDaq HuDDaq je tlha' qeylIS,
all the way back to the edge of the sea. (He followed him to the sea's edge.)
   bIQ'a' HeHDaq tlha'.
And there on the shore, (and there,)
   'ej pa',
they fought for twelve days and twelve nights.
   qaStaHvIS wa'maH cha' pem wa'maH cha' ram je Suvchuq.
Qeylls killed his brother at the break of the thirteenth morning. (Day 13's dawn Kahless killed his brother.)
   jaj wa'maH wej jajlo' loDnI'Daj HoH qeylIS.
There is no victory without honor. (If there is no honour, there is no victory.)
   quv tu'lu'be'chugh, yay tu'lu'be'.


A thousand years ago,
   wa'SaDben,
at the dawn of the Empire, (when the Empire's dawn happened,)
   qaSDI' wo' jajlo',
five hundred warriors stormed the Great Hall at Qam-Chee.
   *Qam-Chee*Daq  vaS'a' luHIv vaghvatlh SuvwI'pu'.
The city garrison fled before them. (Because of them the city guard fled.)
   chaHmo' Haw' veng 'avwI'pu'.
Only the Emperor Kahless, and the Lady Lukara stood their ground. (   Emperor Kahless and the Lady Lukara only remained.)
   ratlh qeylIS voDleH *lukara* joH je neH.
Finally,
   tagha'
after many hours,
   qaSDI' rep law',
and with the Great Hall ankle-deep in blood, (and the blood has a depth of an ankle in the great hall)
   'ej veS'a'Daq ngIb Saw' 'Iw
they emerged victorious, (they achieved a victory)
   yay luchavta'
and made passionate love. (and they perfectly mated with each other.)
   'ej ngaghchuqchu'.
It was here that they began the greatest romance in Klingon history.  (Here, they initiated Klingon history's best romance.)
   naDev, tlhIngan qun parmaq nIvqu' lutagh.
   
   
Long ago, (A thousand years ago,)
   wa'SaDben,
a storm was heading for the city of Quin'lat. (Quin'lat city expected that it storms.)
   jev 'e' pIH *Quin'lat* veng.
Everyone took protection within the walls (The city walls protected everybody)
   Hoch Qan yergho
except one man who remained outside. (but one man remained outside.)
   'ach Hur ratlh wa' loD.
Kahless went to him (Kahless approached him)
   ghaH ghoS qeylIS
and asked what he was doing. (He asked, he said: "What are you doing?")
   ghel, jatlh: <<nuq Data'taH?>>
"I am not afraid," the man said. (The man said: "I am not scared".)
   jatlh loD: <<vIghIjlu'be'.>>
"I will not hide my face behind stone and mortar. ("I won't hide my face in the walls' area behind)
   <<yergho 'emDaq qabwIj vISo'Qo'.
I will stand before the wind (I will stand in the wind)
   SuSDaq jIQam
and make it respect me." (In order that it honours me.")
   muquvmoHmeH   SuSDaq jIQam.>>
Kahless honored his choice
    wIvDaj quvmoH qeylIS
and went back inside. (and he returned inside.)
   'ej qoD chegh
The next day, the storm came, (the next day, it started to storm)
   jaj veb, jevchoH,
and the man was killed,
   'ej loD HoHlu'pu',
as the wind does not respect a fool.
   qoH vuvbe' SuS.

[tesseraktik]

Impressive, Jon!  Something I wonder about, though:

ta'Ha'qu'mo' {because he really un-accomplishes} - I wonder if what Morath did was really to un-accomplish in the sense that the -Ha' suffix implies.  According to Klingonska Akademien, this suffix "indicates that something that was previously done is now undone, or that something is done wrongly" (wrongly, I'm assuming, as in unsuccessfully, inefficiently or the like, rather than as in morally incorrect). One could perhaps argue that his acts were destructive and thus undid accomplishment, but it seems to me that we should try to translate misdeed as accomplishment which is dishonorable / causes dishonor.

Would something like quvHa'moHqu'bogh ta'mo', loDnI'Daj Hup 'e' quq qeylIS work?  If I'm on the right track, it should mean something along the lines of on account of deed which really cause him to be dishonored/dishonorable, Kahless decides to punish his brother.  I chose to put the -qu' (emphasis suffix) after the -moH (cause suffix) rather than on quvHa' (to be dishonored/dishonorableso as to put weight on how efficiently this deed strips somebody of honor, rather than on how much much honor it strips one of; I'm not sure if this was wise, but I find it interesting to play with such things.
Alternatively, could one perhaps use ta'mo' quvHa'qu' loDnI'Daj Hup 'e' quq qeylIS?  Basically, this should, by my logic, translate as Because of really dishonorable deed, Kahless decides to punish his brother, but I'm not sure how adjectives affect nouns that have the -mo' (because of, due to) suffix.

[Floris Schonfeld]

Greetings Jon and Fraek!

Thank you for your responses!

I think the stories of Qeylls are very central to Klingon culture so a translation is an important in the understanding of the Klingon way.

You have made an important step for Klingon Culture as a whole!

Qapla' to you!

Many thanks,

Floris
   

[SoplaHtaHwI']

I had a stab at this. The sentences in brackets are my rephrasings of the originals to ease the translation. I would appreciate any comments or criticism.

A thousand years ago,
   wa'SaDben,

I believe ben is supposed to be a word on its own. So wa'SaD ben or wa' SaD ben.

I have not really looked at the translations closely, for lack of time... I might look them over soon.

[El Payaso Malo]

   muquvmoHmeH

Very good translation! Just a question, why did you use muquvmoHmeH "In order that it honors me" instead of muvuvmeH "So that it respects me?"

wIvDaj quvmoH qeylIS

I'm not sure I would have used this one. It is a literal translation of the English text, but it just doesn't feel like the right choice in Klingon for me.

Like I said, great translation! Too bad most of those proper nouns don't have canon transliterations. For example, I would have translitered "Morath" as something like mor'etlh or mor'eH, but that doesn't guarantee people will know what I'm talking about.
 

[qurgh_]

Hopefully Floris will release the text of the Opera. I hear it has a bunch of proper nouns in it for major Klingon characters. Since it's done by Marc it'll give us more canon name translations!

[El Payaso Malo]

That will be awesome! I doubt one will be Kurn, however.